Saturday, January 16, 2016

The Mystery of the Missing Czech

For the last month, I've been dealing with this insane issue of a certified cheque that bounced... A certified cheque is guaranteed funds and so it's impossible for it to bounce. I called the banks over and over, who kept blaming each other, no one knew what happened, why it "bounced" or where it was. After a month of calling almost every day and even threatening to go to the police, my bank finally decided to refund me the amount, even if there is no proof that the problem was on their end, as we both believe it is the other bank who caused the problem.
Anyway, it's been a stressful adventure, and I've written a open for the occasion.

The Mystery of the Missing Czech

There once was a Czech,
A brave young man.
He soon became a soldier.
He wanted to serve his country,
He wanted to defend his land.

He grew impatient.
Tired of washing dishes,
Czech wanted to be a leader.
One day, he received an audience.
With the General, he spoke.

"I would like to be a leader,
I want to be a sergeant, sir."
He said, and the General laughed.
"A cocky young lad, you are!
First, a corporal you must be."

Czech, more impatient than ever,
Worked harder than the toughest,
Bravest and biggest sergeant.
He moved up quick,
Becoming the leader he knew he could be.

He was not satisfied.
Again, Czech spoke with the General.
"I need my certification,"
He proclaimed. The General nodded.
"So be it. Come see me at dawn."

Czech passed with flying colours.
He was now certified for war.
He packe his bags,
All his earthly possessions.
He left his country to defend it.

But Czech never returned.
No one knew what happened.
He made it to the battle front,
He came came to the base camp.
After that, he disappeared.

Stricken with grief,
The General searched far and wide,
On the battlefield, in the camp,
He searched the towns,
But Czech could not be found.

The enemy had not seen him,
The basecamp did not remember
No one seemed to know.
Czech disappeared into thin air,
Like a bird, he flew away.

That was the only explanation.
The General never saw him again,
His proud protégé, like a son he was.
"Come back to me," he cried.
But never again, was Czech seen.

The General, on the other hand,
Never ceased to search
For his missing Czech.


  1. Hey Emilie, I actually come from a financial background (in the US) and I can tell you that here there is no such thing as guaranteed funds unless you have been given cash in your hand. The person who was issued the check to give to you can still cancel it, the check could have been fraudulent in the first place, really there are actually a whole list of things that can go wrong even when a check is titled "certified." But of course, that is here in America, and you have already been issued a refund! So luckily none of this matters and you can just count this as a learning experience! I'm glad it all worked out :)

    1. Hey! Maybe it's different in the US... The idea of a certified cheque is that the bank "certifies" that there is money, and it's actually taken out of the account when the cheque is made so that it doesn't bounce. According to my bank, the cheque was done exactly as it normally would have been done, and the other bank tried to cash it twice, then was rejected as a duplicate. Either way, no one wanted to take blame and my bank decided to take care of its customer. :)
      It was definitely a frustrating time and a reminder that banks kind of really suck haha.


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