Sarcastic Guide to Taking the Subway

For April Fools', I thought I share some helpful tips on how to ride the subway. It's a new thing for me as in Winnipeg, we only have busses, while in Berlin, you've got the U-bahn, the S-bahn, the Tram, the Metro-Tram, and the Bus, the Metro-Bus and the Night Bus. The possibilities are endless!

Here are a few tips to taking the subway:

1. Ignore the blaring siren signalling the doors closing. Don't worry, they won't close on you.

2. People love when you talk to them. Start up a conversation with the person sitting next to you! Germans love nothing more than a bit of chit chat about the weather on their morning commute.

3. If you don't feel like talking, make sure to play your music really loud without headphones for everyone to enjoy!

4. Don't worry about the people standing. Put your bag on the seat next to you so you don't have to hold it in your lap.

5. Please, for crying out loud, don't pay the fare! It's a whole €2,70! What a waste.

6. If you get caught without a ticket, just pretend you're a tourist. Or run as fast as possible.

7. Don't worry if you're late. The busses and trains will always wait for you.

8. You will encounter beggars and musicians asking for money. Always, always, always give them a little something.

9. If you're on the escalator don't worry about blocking the flow of traffic. It's an escalator; everyone will get there at the same time.

10. If you're on a bus, you should use the front door to get off. It's where you came in, might as well go out that way too!